Late Stage Dementia: A Thousand Goodbyes

What marks late stage dementia? A thousand goodbyes

The loss of someone with late stage dementia – whether brought on by Alzheimer’s, Parkinson’s, Lewy Body disease, or following decades of a life well-lived – is not one goodbye, but thousands. There is not one moment of loss, but dozens upon dozens – sometimes multiple losses in a moment.

Late stage dementia manifests itself in so many ways. The inability to recognize your daughter as who she is, but rather, who your mind deceives you that she is – your sister, your childhood friend, even your own mother. That moment is a loss of so much – of her memory, but also her memories – the first sounds and first steps and birthday cakes and family camping trips – and everything in between – that make her who she is.

And while it is often true that she can reminisce at length about the house she grew up in (which, fortunately, my grandparents lived in well into my adulthood, so I can ask her relevant questions about it), these patches of memory do not carry the same significance, the same depth of understanding of a life lived across seven decades.

We listen.

Patiently, we listen. Trying to weave the fragments of thoughts that emerge from her mouth into our understanding of her life. For that is how we make meaning. And our memories are shifting as well. Each week, each month, each year of steady cognitive decline creates for us more memories of her as she is – leaving less space for memories of who she is. Late stage dementia robs the patient of their memory and their loves ones of their memories.

The slow, nearly empty woman who sits before us is replacing the mom who didn’t hesitate to play softball, jump in the pool or speak her mind.

A thousand goodbyes, just today. For today alone we have lost a thousand shared memories – gone from her memory and fading from mine.

And tomorrow, another thousand goodbyes. Too many to count, too many to speak aloud or attempt to record.

We reminisce.

A life lived is only truly recorded in memories. We pull out photos and videos, yearbooks and other memorabilia from another century. Far-flung friends mail her back letters she sent to them decades ago, in lieu of their visits, prevented by health guidelines. But none of these alone can tap the memories behind them.

So we listen. Hoping that some of the words that tumble out of her mouth will string themselves into a story again – a coherent thought that contains the memories behind that black and white photo or crackly video clip that was migrated from film to first to VHS tapes, then to DVDs, and now to hard drive.

We say goodbye.

But mostly we say a thousand goodbyes. And she does too, in the confused silence that locks her in more and more each day.

Person of Color: Being In Between

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Dear Class of 2024: Where to go to college

Where to go to college?

Learning what is a “yes” and what is a “no” is often more art than science, a gut feeling or a sixth sense that something is a fit. It is also a luxury – there are many college students who either do not realize that they are choosing a path of “no” when they leave high school, or who realize that they are not choosing a “yes,” but follow that path anyway, either due to outside forces or a lack of other options.

Understanding what is a “yes” and what is a “no” is arguably the most important future planning a high school student can undertake – including understanding where to go to college. As a school counselor I am asked nearly constantly about “enough”:

Do I have “enough” AP classes?

Is my schedule rigorous “enough”?

Am I doing “enough” activities?

As these questions swirl, I push back, with my own questions:

Do you think you will enjoy the advanced classes you have chosen?

Will you have time to balance school with life with this class schedule?

Are you involved in an activity that is meaningful and fulfilling to you?

The process of applying to college is all-too-often seen as a finish line, rather than a starting line. Indeed, there is almost no real benefit to being accepted to colleges – regardless of the name. The benefits of college come as you seek to get something out of your college experience.

The Best Laid Plans

I did not set out to be a high school counselor. I really didn’t even think I was going to be a teacher. But applying to Teach for America was an appealing option to my 21-year-old, history-major-self, so I did. And while I struggled with the “schmooze” of corporate interviews and often bungled the case studies at different consulting companies, I immediately felt at home teaching my three minute “lesson” to a room full of other college students (and a few other adults seeking a second – or third – career).

And after being placed as a secondary social studies teacher in San Jose, California, I went to grad school, teaching all day, and going to school several evenings a week for years. First for my teaching credential, and then, I thought, to get a Masters in Teaching. But the first week of classes in my Masters in History Education program, I had a change of heart – and a change of “major” – and instead enrolled in a School Counselor cohort program in partnership with my school district.

That cohort experience cemented by commitment to the field of counseling, but also made it difficult to look away from the egregious administrative decisions being made in the district at the time. Though I dug in with the school community – serving on committees and councils, assuming a leadership role before the ink was dry on my counseling credential – my work was not valued by my supervisors.

So I became a teacher. Again.

Which helped me see how much I thrived as a counselor.

I’m not a bad teacher, but I’m a better counselor.

You have to understand the “no” to realize what is a “yes.”

In (affiliate link) The Price You Pay for College, Ron Leiber puts forth three reasons that explain why most individuals attend college: the curriculum or learning experience, the community or connections you build, and the certificate, degree or other outward signs of completion.

Don’t over-focus on the piece of paper

While many families may focus on the third aspect, it is the other two areas where teens can more easily gauge what is a “yes” and what is a “no.” The vast majority of first-time freshmen are seeking a Bachelor’s degree in some form. Sure a few may know for certain that a B.Arch. or a B.F.A. is in the future. Others may apply for dual degree programs which springboard into Masters degrees, or MD programs. But there are few who head to college campuses who plan to hang out for a few years and then move on, regardless of whether or not they have any sort of certification.

Additionally, it’s important to remember that a minority of adults work in fields directly related to their college major. There is more to college than the degree.

The forces that keep a student in college typically have much more to do with curriculum and community than they do with certificates and degrees. So when considering where to go to college, consider the curriculum and the community as key parts of the decision.

Curriculum

Let’s start with the curriculum. Most colleges and universities, even those of small-to-moderate size, have course catalogs that dwarf those of even the largest high schools in the country. It is the rare college freshman who has had concrete experience with the vast majority of curricular areas they are likely to encounter in college. What this means is that high school students who intend to attend college should explore many possible learning opportunities- both formal and informal – in order to help them arrive at a range of options that could be in the “yes” category.

Exposure is key. If entire courses are not available in anthropology or engineering, then use museums to explore these areas. If film or landscape design is not a school-based option, then look for camps, contests, or locals working in the field. Experiences don’t have to – and arguably shouldn’t – cost a lot to help students gain exposure to a possible major and career pathway.

I frequently reflect on the experiences of a student I worked with many years ago. He built his college list in the spring of his junior year, as many students do, and as an self-proclaimed animal-lover, he focused entirely on pre-veterinary programs. That summer he volunteered at an animal hospital for the first time. Though he emerged from the summer with his strong love of animals intact, his interest in being a vet was extinguished. Just a few weeks spent with sick, injured, and dying animals taught more than any career inventory or college website could have. Needless to say, his college list was revised entirely that fall.

Community & Connection

The college community can be difficult to quantify. I put great stock in the “gut feeling” on this – which means my heart goes out to the many, many students in the Class of 2020 and 2021 who have not had significant opportunities to understand campus communities by spending time there. Though it is likely that future classes will regain this ability, the treasure trove of virtual tours will not disappear – and there is much to be gleaned from your gut feeling in viewing those as well.

Additionally, try to connect with current students, and ask alumni if they would attend their alma mater again. This second idea has become a pandemic conversation-starter for us as I support my own high school freshman in understanding the characteristics of various colleges and universities. (The other question we ask, based on curriculum and learning is, “What did you learn in college that you use on a regular basis today?” These two questions have been our lockdown version of the informal college tours that have not been possible in the past year.)

So what did you want to get out of your college experience? And what did you actually walk away with? Not everything can be planned, but much can be explored when you move beyond the names, and focus on the characteristics. Most high school students also identify some sort of geographic or location-based preferences as well. So whether you have a teen who prefers urban living with four seasons, or outdoor-focused, small-town living with year-round warmth, if you layer these preferences alongside their “yes” and “no” votes in terms of curriculum and community, the college list will begin to build itself.

Where to go to college? In so many ways the answer is to find a place where you find more in YOUR “yes” column than in your “no” column – and chances are that place will provide you both a curriculum and community that will serve you well.

Dear Class of 2024: How to Get Into College

Dear Class of 2024: 10 Tips for New High School Students

Color Street Patriotic Collection 2021: Festive New Options

The Color Street Patriotic Collection is here.

There are 4 fun designs to bring extra fun and sparkle to your Memorial Day weekend, Independence Day celebration, or any other festive occasion that calls for red, white and blue!

4 Options for Color Street Patriotic

This year’s features the Americana collection, three nail designs and one clear overlay. American Dream and Glitz and Glory are sparkly versions of stars and stripes- one with white glitter and the other with silver. Blue Jean Baby is a denim dream – a first for Color Street. And Bandana Republic is a clear overlay that adds a touch of Americana to any color or pattern you choose!

Ready to shop? Click here: www.larasandora.com/shop

Want to try a sample first? Request one here: www.larasandora.com/sample

Father’s Day, Redefined

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Educator Expectations: The Evolution of a Profession

Educator Expectations

I have been an educator for more than two decades. This field has evolved around me in ways that I rarely take time to process. But when I pause and reflect, the transformation is mind-blowing. Many of you have been on this journey as long as I have, or much longer. Others of you were students yourselves who experienced these changes from the other side. Regardless, it’s been a wild ride – be sure to buckle up and keep your hands and arms inside the car at all times.

Content

When I was an elementary and high school student, a major (or sometimes even a minor) in the subject you wished to teach was sufficient. You needed to take classes in instruction and evaluation and child and adolescent psychology, but your academic background was not questioned. As I emerged into the world of teaching, content-area exams (then the SSAT and Praxis, now the CSET and others), became necessary.

As a high school social studies teacher, I was required to have in-depth knowledge of California history, a subject taught explicitly only in 3rd and 4th grade standards. Thus early in my career, educator expectations included cramming for those exams. Colleagues just a few years older than I marveled at the content – some of which they assured me that they hadn’t reviewed since they were in 4th grade themselves. Yet, like most of us with current teaching credentials, I proved my ability to teach this content in this way.

Classroom Management

As a student I was a rule-follower, painfully shy, and almost mute in most classes. To say that I lacked insight into classroom management as a student is gross understatement. My educator experience lacked the personal experience of being disconnected from school. So I took all the classes. Read all the books. Made administrators regular guests in my classroom. And eventually figured out how to assert myself as a twenty-something, 5-foot-something female in a class of 37 (yes, 37!) teenagers. This wasn’t my favorite part of teaching, but it made teaching content more possible, so I embraced it.

Pseudo-Parenting

I was 22 when I started teaching, closer in age to my students than to their parents. Yet it became clear that for many of them, I was one of the most stable adults in their lives. I was, with little life experience myself, a role model. I found myself weighing in on things like the empty calories in hot Cheetos, the need to go to bed before 2 am, and the best way to get a stain out of white polo shirt (which were required clothing at my school, a rarity in public high schools).

This was an unexpected educator role – one that no one had told me about. At no time in my 23-year-career have I felt more out of my league than when a young, pregnant student had her water break in the middle of my US History class. Yet this aspect of educator expectations brought me a greater connection with my students, and the school community.

Language Supports

I earned my credential at a time when a CLAD (Cross-cultural, Language, and Academic Development) certificate was required. I taught several sections of social studies for students who would now carry both EL and Long Term EL (LTEL) tags in one room. It created a complex instructional dynamic, but also a positive social one – one in which LTEL students translated instructions for newly arrived students and then they collaborated on assignments in multilingual, multicultural groups. Now providing language supports is embedded in educator expectations: translating extensively for parents and guardians, while pushing the learners themselves to practice English in scaffolded settings.

Safety

I was teaching during the attacks on Columbine High School. It was the spring of 1999 – my first year in the classroom. Within a week we were taught – and then taught our students – how to barricade a door. The terminology would come later – “code red,” “lockdown,” “Columbine locks” – but the actions were taught swiftly. Growing up, my “sport” of choice was ballet – hardly a breeding ground for the sort of skills that one thinks about when building barricades or thwarting intruders. Yet, as for all of you, this has become second nature to me, integral to my educator experience, and one more layer in what it means to be an educator in the twenty-first century.

Technology

When I was in college, I was among the first non-engineering students to have a school email address. I didn’t have a cell phone until a few years into my teaching career. I didn’t have a computer in my classroom – instead I carried a (not-so-floppy) “floppy” disk to the staff lounge each day during my prep to print my files and update my grade book (after one year of using the dreaded “green boxes” of a paper grade book, I was an early adopter of an online grade book; I transpose numbers in a form of dyscalculia so those were an utter nightmare for me!). In the early years of my career, educator expectations were far from technology-focused.

Around 2000, the internet broke wide open -and right into our classrooms. Suddenly I went from zero computers in my classroom to 35 brand new laptops – though they barely made it through a class period without needing to charge. Educator expectations about using technology have changed exponentially in the past two decades, and then exponentially again during the pandemic. If nothing else, I think the past year has bridged the gap from technology being “one more thing” to technology being seamlessly integrated into curriculum and instruction. Can technology add extra layers of complication to lessons? Absolutely. But it also brought us access, inclusion, and individual accountability in ways that few of us anticipated 18 months ago.

Culturally Responsive

I was teaching on September 11, 2001. And while the trauma of plane crashes and collapsing buildings was far enough away to shield our school community, the rash of hate crimes and racially- and religiously-charged attacks hit home in a school where fewer than 5% of our students were White. So we detoured from our introduction to latitude and longitude to discuss why our Sikh classmates covered their hair and to distinguish the humanity of Islam from the inhumanity of the terrorists.

That was a turning point early in my career, but the opportunity to have this kind of real-time discussion has not diminished in the past two decades. Instead, we are increasingly asked to manage these conversations – and the corresponding emotions – in our schools. Educator expectations continue to grow with each unfolding event or crisis.

Inclusion

In 2004 the federal government reauthorized IDEA, the Individuals with Disabilities in Education Act – which of course has impacted educator expecations. Which means my career has overlapped with a steady march toward more inclusive practices and policies. These shifts have not always been smooth – such as the admittedly rocky switch to co-teaching in our district several years ago – but the intention remains important. And parenting a child with special needs who is fast-approaching his high school years has made me all the more attuned to how much growth there still is in this area.

Activism and Social Justice

Regardless of your political views, 2016 was a galvanizing year for American politics – and no exception was made for our young people. The election results in November 2016 elicited strong feelings – as did the numerous decisions made in the years of the Trump administration. Many of those decisions sparked responses that we had to manage at school – including walk outs and other forms of protests – that transformed the educator expectations yet again.

In 2018, the mass shooting at Parkland High School mobilized students to speak out and march against gun violence. Beginning in 2013, the Black Lives Matter movement has grown in strength and reach, with a crescendo in the spring of 2020 following the now-adjudicated murder of George Floyd. These responses, as well as the follow up to the 2020 election, we learned to manage in Zoom rooms and other social distant ways.

Health and Well-Being

Nursing and teaching are oft-compared career pathways. Both are helping professions requiring certification beyond a bachelor’s degree. Both are fields dominated by women (yes, I know that this skews at the secondary and post-secondary levels, but overall there is a 3:1 discrepancy). And both careers put you in a place where you must balance your own well-being with that of your patients/students – or risk a career-ending level of burnout.

In many ways we are being asked to manage our students’ health right now – we are supervising desk sanitizing and competing with air purifiers. There are one-way hallways, plexiglass cubbies, and tented teaching spaces. These are the new educator expectations.

But you must manage your own health and well-being. It is not a choice. You need to come first, not last. Your ability to teach and serve students effectively hinges on your ability to be a healthy individual. Not only because modeling your own well-being helps communicate the importance of doing so to your students, but because you must put your own oxygen mask on first in order to continue serving as an educator. Meeting educator expecations is central to your life, no doubt, but it is not worth your life.

Educator Wellness: 6 Protective Factors

Compassion Fatigue Resources for Educators

Color Street Application Tips You Need To Know

Need some tips for Color Street application?

Have you ever ruined a manicure on your way out of a nail salon? (my “record” was destroying a fresh manicure in the parking lot of the salon, while turning the key in my ignition!) Have you ever felt like your at-home manicure was just not living up to your expectations? Maybe you have heard of Color Street, but you are not sure about the application process? When applied correctly, Color Street can stand up to cooking, camping, baking, gardening, 12 loads of laundry, and a sinkful of dishes – nightly.

If you, like so many others, have switched to a DIY manicure at home, then you probably have found Color Street. If you haven’t tried Color Street yet, it’s time. Real nail polish in easy-to-use strips. Great designs. Lasts 10-14 days. Comes off with regular nail polish remover.

A mani in the car? Sure – as long as you’re not driving. Just keep these Color Street application tips in mind and you can do a manicure almost anywhere. There is no liquid polish to spill, no strong smells to overwhelm those near you, and when used correctly, Color Street can actually be quite forgiving in case there is a little bump in the road.

Here are some Color Street application hacks you need need to know:

Storage:

Color Street application actually begins with a well-stored set. It’s important to store Color Street at moderate room temperature, away from direct heat or sunlight. Stored correctly, Color Street nail strips will last a full year (and often longer!). If you live in a cold climate, or your home is well-air-conditioned, it can help to warm the package of strips gently before your next Color Street application.

You can remove the plastic sleeve from the packaging and place it under (or even between!) your thighs while you prep your nails to bring them back to moderate room temperature. For Color Street application in the heat of summer, you may need to place the entire package in the refrigerator or freezer for 1-3 minutes, again, to bring them to moderate room temperature. For Color Street application to go smoothly, your strips should be flexible but not sticky.

Durability:

For your Color Street application to last the longest, choose a glitter shade. The Color Street glitter options are beautiful, sparkly and also tend to last the longest. Color Street typically lasts 10-14 days; you may find that solids are showing wear on the shorter end of that range.

Another way to extend the wear on your strips is to double up your strips, by applying one layer over the other. If your nails are on the shorter side, you can use one strip to create two layers. After applying one layer, simply turn the strip around and apply the other end of the strip as a second layer. The other option is to use Clear as Day as a top coat. Bonus: Clear as Day comes 32 strips per pack instead of 16!

Chipping/Slipping:

Chipping can sometimes occur if your nails were not completely clean before Color Street application. Before you start, you should always wash your hands, give your nails a gentle scrub, and dry completely. If you find that the nail polish strips seem to slip or slide around on your nails, you may have oily nail beds.

If you do, there is an easy fix: when you wash your hands, use a drop of (grease-fighting!) dish soap, rather than hand soap, then dry thoroughly. Be sure to use the provided prep pad (or a swipe of your own rubbing alcohol). Lastly, allow your nails a good 30 minutes or so to completely cure, after your Color Street application. I recommend doing them right before bed so they cure fully overnight!

“Chunky” Glitters:

The strips that have large glitter chunks can sometimes leave a piece of glitter hanging off the end of the nail. The best way to deal with this is to use a nail clipper to clip the extra glitter.

There you have it- all my best Color Street application tips and tricks. And when you are ready to remove them and put on a new set, then check out my tips for removing Color Street here.

Are You Making These Color Street Mistakes? Plus Quick Fixes

Applying French Manicure Color Street in 8 Easy Steps

Hawaiian Sweet Rolls: Delicious, Low-Dairy Recipe

Do you need Hawaiian sweet rolls? Don’t we all?

In Hawaii, sweet bread is ubiquitous. It is formed into rolls and loaves, flavored (and colored) with bright pink guava and purple taro. It is sliced for sandwiches and sizzled into French toast, enjoyed for breakfast, or as a side with kalua pork. It is also something that we have try (mightily) to hide from Mr. Diggy.

Hawaiian sweet rolls are part of the Portuguese history of the islands. The most widely-known brand of Hawaiian sweet bread is King’s Hawaiian, which, somewhat controversially, is no longer produced in Hawaii. On island, our preference is typically for Punalu’u Bakeshop – the southernmost bakery in the United States. Their products are widely available on the islands, and may be shipped nationwide as well. Another island small business is Ani’s – this family-run bakery makes large round loaves in a variety of flavors.

The vast majority of recipes for Hawaiian sweet rolls contain a lot of dairy – it is, after all, an enriched dough, typically made with both butter and milk. Some at-home recipes often go a step further, swapping the milk for even more lactose-laden powdered dry milk. For sweetness, some recipes call for pineapple juice, one of the few non-lactose allergies Mr. Diggy suffers. So when my dear friend Lisa, whose husband grew up in Hilo, told me she had perfected her recipe for Hawaiian sweet roll – without either powdered milk or pineapple – I knew I had to try it.

Because the amount of butter in the recipe is small, and butter is low in lactose, I didn’t touch that, but I did swap the dairy milk for oat milk, settled on honey as a sweetener (Hawaiian, if you can find it), and chose pink Hawaiian salt for the top. The result? A perfectly pillowy, low-lactose Hawaiian style roll. While it’s easy to inhale the entire pan immediately after they come out of the oven, you can also slice the rolls horizontally and pile them with kalua pork, shredded huli huli (Hawaiian barbecue) chicken, or burgers. Next time, I’ll try the recipe in a loaf pan, to see how it will work for French toast.

Hawaiian Sweet Bread Rolls – Low Dairy Version

Print Recipe Pin Recipe

Prep Time 18 mins

Cook Time 22 mins

Rising Time 2 hrs

Total Time 2 hrs 40 mins

Course Side Dish

Cuisine American

Ingredients

½ cup oat milk or other milk
1 ¼ tsp active dry yeast
1 egg room temperature
2 T butter warmed, but not melted
1 T honey Hawaiian if you can find it, or sugar
1 ½ cups all purpose flour
½ tsp salt

Topping

1 T butter
½ T honey
½ tsp salt Hawaiian if you can find it, or flaky sea salt

Instructions

Gently warm the milk – do not boil or simmer and pour into the bowl of your stand mixer (or other bowl). Add the yeast. The heat should activate the yeast, not kill it, so it should foam within a few minutes.
Add the egg, butter and honey (or sugar) and mix to combine. Add flour and salt and mix 8-10 minutes with the mixer (or by hand).
Rest 1 hour, covered. Lightly grease a pie pan or round cake pan. Divide dough into 6 equal pieces and form into balls. Place into pan, and rest 1 more hour, covered.
Bake at 350 for 18-22 minutes. Remove from the oven, then melt butter and honey together and brush over warm rolls. Top each with a pinch of salt.

Notes

Enjoy a taste of Hawaii in your kitchen.

Keyword bread

The Big Game, Big Island Style

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Hawaiian Food Recipes: A Taste of Hawaii – at Home via The Piece of Mind Retreat

Educator Wellness: 6 Protective Factors

What about educator wellness?

As thousands of schools begin to physically reopen, much has been said about the hoped-for positive effects on the mental health and well-being of our youth. But what about the educators who are preparing to close the school year in a different, but still chaotic, environment from the one in 2020?

You may be familiar with the ACES study- which resulted in a tool to assess Adverse Childhood Experiences in our schools and community. Two books on the subject, The Deepest Well by Nadine Burke Harris (affiliate link) and The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel van der Kolk, both address the science behind the ACES, as well as some ideas to move forward.

Here are ways to consider implementing these protective measures for educator wellness in both your personal and professional life:

1: Sleep

A common theme is that no one seems to get enough of it – adults or teens. And sleep is foundational to educator wellness. If you are having trouble falling asleep, create habits that support winding down for 30-45 minutes before you are trying to actually fall asleep. If you are feeling you don’t have enough hours in the day, try writing down what you are doing for a full day and see if you can “find” some time.

Are you doing things a family member could do instead? Are you scrolling social media to avoid grading? Are you spending a lot of time on something that has little positive impact? Also be sure to discuss options with your doctor, like melatonin (which, as a bonus, helps decrease the severity of COVID symptoms, per my physician).

2: Nutrition

For a month this semester, I taught 7 periods straight on Monday and Tuesdays. It greatly increased my empathy for my full-time teacher colleagues, and it has taught me to be thoughtful about what I choose to eat at 10:02 and 11:37. Think about high-protein, lower carb foods that won’t leave your hands sticky as you answer emails in between bites. Spiced nuts and trail mixes are a solid choice, or air-popped popcorn with olive oil and some flavored salt. Try a thermal mug to keep your tea or coffee warm for longer.

3: Exercise

After an early quarantine period of sluggishness, I have committed to an early morning workout most days of the week. If the weather permits, I walk. Otherwise I do some sort of YouTube or other online fitness class. But if you are not a morning person, then workout at night. Or on your prep period. Choose something you enjoy – or at least see the benefits from – walking, running, hiking, cycling, swimming, weight-lifting, yoga, dance. And start small. Commit to 30 minutes 3 times a week and build from there.

4: Healthy Relationships

Depending on your quarantine living environment, you may be choosing to work in your empty classroom or office to preserve your sanity. Or maybe you live alone and use your walk around the neighborhood to stay connected with others nearby. Consider a phone call – not a Zoom – to catch up with friends to fill your heart, and give your eyes a break. After a year of remote relationships, think critically about how your email, text, and chat messages reflect on you and aim for clear, concise communication on all platforms to avoid unwanted miscommunications and crossed wires. Maintaining positive, healthy relationships can go a long way toward supporting educator wellness.

5: Mental Health

If you already live with a mental health diagnosis, then you are hopefully finding tools to support your coping skills. Telehealth works well for some, and not for others. If you don’t live with a diagnosis, but are instead struggling with pandemic-induced anxiety or quarantine-fueled depression, you also need coping skills. And not all coping skills come in prescription bottles. In fact, all of the four items above can help you manage your mental health during this year-long marathon of stressors.

6: Mindfulness

I saved the best for last. I know that there is a lot (did I say a LOT?) of skepticism around mindfulness. And while I do believe that meditation has a place in supporting well-being, I also recognize that it is not for everyone. So if you are one to accidentally snicker during a meditation – or you’ve been asked to leave a yoga class – then focus on the mindfulness, not the meditation.

Anything and everything you do in your life can be done mindfully. The mundane, like washing dishes, chopping onions, or mowing the lawn can often be done better if you simply focus on the task at hand. Or the near-constant pandemic activity of hand-washing: pay full attention to the temperature of the water, the scent of the soap, the texture of the towel. And if you practice this mindfulness in your daily life, you will be mindful of more special moments – like the peace you find at the top of a mountain, or the joy you find in hugging hello to good friends before celebrating a year’s worth of milestones with good food and drinks.

What methods are you using to support educator wellness? Tag me on Instagram with your ideas.

Pandemic Anniversary: One Year Later

Compassion Fatigue: Resources for Educators

Celebrate Small: Festive ideas for a new era

Celebrate Small: Festive recipes for a new era

Why Celebrate Small?

If 2020 was a year to celebrate small by force, consider making 2021 a year to celebrate small by choice. While large parties, packed stadiums, and concert throngs hold a certain appeal, you may find yourself a little spooked by the prospect of returning to such large events any time soon.

In 2020 we stumbled into the porch picnic, the driveway happy hour, the backyard brunch; now let’s embrace those. When you celebrate small, you can have real conversations with a few people. When you celebrate small, you are thoughtful about the mix of people you include – to ensure those conversations are lively. When you celebrate small, you can get creative with the food – and mix and match smaller quantities of recipes you might not normally try.

As we begin the “re-entry” from what we hope to be the worst of the pandemic, you may be asked what you have missed the most. For some, it’s concerts, the bustling crowds at a mall, or the crowds at a stadium. For me it’s hospitality. My kitchen is filled with platters and bowls, drink dispensers and table cloths. My heart is filled with the desire to welcome and sustain others. And my mind is filled with the understanding of just how long it will be before we can host another large Mardi Gras birthday party or a festive Galentine’s Day event.

Since hosting and hospitality changed entirely in 2020, it’s time to look ahead at ways to embrace and celebrate the small. (Bonus for our #AutismFamily: MUCH less risk of autism meltdowns in this world of small).

Celebrate Small: Celebration Ideas

Host small: instead of a huge cocktail party or barbecue, host smaller, intimate versions of these events
Host outdoors: when possible, continue to entertain in outdoor spaces – remember your guests may also be squeamish about enclosed spaces after a year of distance
Host on Zoom: while the novelty of a Zoom Happy Hour has worn thin, don’t discount the power of Zoom for connecting with far-flung family and friends. You can check out this Zoom scavenger hunt for a fun activity for groups of almost any size.
Host a food swap: cook or bake for others while keeping your distance. While I may have previously porch-dropped extra zucchini or other less-welcome gifts, I have enjoyed the quarantine culture of more pleasant porch drops – cakes, pies, cookies, tarts – all baked with love (and a healthy dose of quarantine stir-craziness!). We even did a distanced cookie exchange – which I hope we will repeat for years to come. Instead of leaving a typical in-person, cookie exchange laden with dozens of cookies, destined to go stale, we spread out our baking over several weeks. Each week meant a new treat to be enjoyed, without a sugar overload.

Celebrate Small: Food Ideas

Single-serve savory: Try serving stuffing or other side dishes in ramekins, and consider single-serve entrees, like fish or chicken cooked en papillote or in a pouch. Serve soups in mugs, and consider stand-up salads in wide-mouth mason jars
Small sips: No celebration is complete without a toast – mini champagne splits certainly fit the bill, as do the growing number of options of canned wines on the market. There are plenty of festive non-alcoholic options as well, including slender cans of Izze sparkling juice, and the refreshing slim bottles of mixers from Fever Tree.
Small-scale baking: While at the beginning of the pandemic I was making as much bread as my flour supplies allowed, I have scaled back. The Tartine recipe works beautifully cut in half, resulting in enough dough for a substantial loaf, or even for two pizza crusts and a slender loaf. Try these mini-pavlovas, or my new favorite: muffin-tin pies. After much experimentation, I have settled on a jumbo muffin tin as the ideal size for mini-pies and tarts, including this lilikoi tart recipe.

The Kona area of the Big Island of Hawaii is our home away from home. And while we haven’t been able to host as much as we typically do, sharing our home away from home is a way to maintain a sense of hospitality – from afar. With strict testing protocols in place, travel to Hawaii has been more possible than to many other places. But this tart allows you a taste of the islands to tide you over until you book your next trip.

Lilikoi Tarts (Passionfruit Tarts)

Print Recipe Pin Recipe

Prep Time 15 mins

Cook Time 45 mins

Total Time 1 hr

Course Dessert

Cuisine American